Night 3

May 30, 2013


Yes so again I lay in wait, waiting for my prince to shout from below my chambers, wanting to be let up into my lair………..(except he’d better not shout or Chester will wake up and so will Dad. Oh my God!)

As you can imagine, last night was amazing. I can’t describe how complete he makes me feel; how loved and how desired. I feel blessed. I have talked to a few other girls about their relationships and they say that they have fun in bed but it’s usually a fast and furious thing, over too soon. Passionate but short lived. Not mine. Lee seems to LOVE exploring and taking his time. That’s fine by me. I think if he just shagged me and turned over and went to sleep I would lay there and cry. I know I can be an insensitive bitch but Lee has really got me, in so many ways. he has melted my ice cold heart and warmed up my hostile and unaffectionate body!

I imagined that sex would be a nice physical thing, but has proved to be so much more. I have fallen more in love with Mr Chapman with every night I have spent engulfed by his soft yet strong arms. I asked him last night (laying there looking at each other, eyelids half down, tired out but not wanting to sleep), if I was special to him or if the other girls he’s been with have made him feel the same as I do. No. No way, he said. He has never felt so connected to another human being mentally and physically. Wow! I also asked him (I don’t know why I did but I had to know) whether he ever felt like sleeping with other girls in London. I mean he worked in a bar for fuck’s sake. A ROCK bar no less. His answer upset me slightly, but I DID ask! I expected him to go ‘no casey, my love, I only want you, I only think about YOU and no other girl ever occupies my mind.’ He didn’t though. He said that he sees a lot of beautiful girls in the bar and a lot of them are slightly, and sometimes very, pissed and they flirt with him. Some even stay there til closing so they can try and get him to go home with them! )Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!) And he enjoys the flirting but that’s all it ever is. AND~(as said almost word for word):

”I am in love with you and that, for me, means I can appreciate other beautiful girls and feel flattered when they chat me up, but I only want you. Most guys can separate sex and love, but I can’t,at least not anymore. I could when I was 15 or 16 but not now. I could never get the same satisfaction from a one night stand however sexy she was. Call me weird, but that’s how I feel. So there you are. ”

Speechless? Yep.

So he will be up the tree soon. Mum and Dad are still up but I know their routine down to the last movement. if they fucking knew what goes on up here! Good job there is a flight of stairs and thick Victorian floors separating their bedroom from mine. I still hold a pillow to my face (very very often!) so I don’t make any loud noise when Lee is doing delicious things to me. OH GOD I LOVE HIM!


I wonder what sex really feels like for guys? I feel a bit weird when I think about it. I mean, we talk about everything, despite my usual icy exterior and unwillingness to divulge emotional stuff, but I will NEVER know how he is feeling while we are doing the deed. THE DEED Hahahahah! I know it’s fucking good whatever it is, judging by the noises HE makes! What’s wrong with me, I can’t get enough of him. Am I a nimfo? If so, well I don’t give a monkey’s chuffer.

Oooo. Silence in the house. Time to send the sex text!

I might pluck up courage to ask him to describe what it feels like…………….

Has anyone reading this ever had that conversation????!!!!

Just found this. An interesting thread! I want to ask Lee so badly now. I’m interested in his analogies………… velvet slipper? Hahaha